May 14, 2023

Attributes of a Good Mother

Attributes of a Good Mother




5th of May, 2023

Topic:                         Attributes of a Good Woman

Preacher:                   Dr. Theresa Odeigha

Text:                           1 Corinthians 9:24



I want to appreciate the Church leadership for counting me worthy today and I pray that the Almighty God will count you worthy before Him in Jesus Name. Thank you for bringing me back here. I have been away for some time and I am sure I’ve come back fully; I pray the Lord will help us in Jesus Name.

We have been talking since yesterday about the Attributes of a Good Mother and Wife and we looked at so many things on our theme: What the Bible says about a woman – that a woman is a gift and a woman has to be patterned after God. Yesterday, we looked at the attributes of a contemporary mother. I am a historian and most times, we look at the past and discover that the past was better than now. We discover that contemporary women are impatient. Looking after the children is supposed to be the work of the church but because the church has failed, the family takes over and it shouldn’t be like that, because there is a tree, made up of God, the husband, the wife, the children, the family, the in-laws, the extended family, friends and the society. In our research, we tried to see how we, the Christians, can move on. We also looked at contemporary mothers and how immorality, disloyalty, anger, jealousy, gossip, impatience, laziness, overbearing are everywhere. We briefly looked at the essential qualities of a mother.

If you want to be a mother, you must be born again. Yesterday, we discovered that women are gifts to their husbands. We are queens and our husbands are the kings. We saw some of the attributes of godly women in the Bible: they built their homes in a godly manner and they don’t associate with unfriendly friends. There are people called unfriendly friends and I gave you an example yesterday. They also had to accept their responsibilities. If you are a mother, you have to accept your responsibility. You need a good relationship with your husband. Many of us don’t have good relationship with our husbands. If my husband was not there, I wonder what I would have been today. I discovered early in my marriage that if you have a misunderstanding with your husband, whatever you are planning comes to an end and I thought within myself, if that is the case, I have to be living right with my husband. We good mothers have to live right with our husbands.

Yesterday, we came to this altar. God is waiting here. He told me before my arrival that he would be here. I don’t just attend any programme. I was supposed to be in a place yesterday and today, to return back tomorrow but because this is my church, I canceled the other appointment for another day. We were here and I took the instruction of God.

If you are not living well with your husband, you can never be a good mother. I have somebody who is very good to me, comes to my house and does many things but in her home, any little misunderstanding, she would carry knife. The husband, most times, would lock the kitchen so that she won’t go there to pick a knife. Are you that kind of mother? I have seen some couples, immediately the husband says a thing, they are already saying two. I can’t imagine my husband talking to me or abusing me and I abuse back, I can’t do it. It is a training. Yesterday, we discovered that for you to be a true wife, you have to undergo a training within yourself in your heart. It’s not something that the pastor would teach you. It is not something that your mother even will teach you but you have to teach yourself to be a good mother, otherwise, you will be in crisis in your home. That will not be our portion in the name of Jesus.

She respects her husband. Some of us don’t respect our husbands. How then do you expect to be a good mother? I told us yesterday that if my husband is returning from work, all of us will go outside to collect the bag he is holding and we will all go back into the house. Are you that kind of wife? When your husband is going out everyday, say, “May the Lord bless you. You will find the favour of God. You will bring back testimony.” A good woman must endeavor to do that every morning when her husband is going out, that is why I said it is a training, it is not something that you achieve in one day. You must undergo a training within yourself and practicalise it. Even if your husband is an alcohol addict, at the time he is going out in the morning, say, “God bless you”, if he replies, “Foolish woman, what do you know? Get out!” Still tell him, “God will bless you. You will come back with testimony”. Everyday, make it a duty. If you are the type of wife that leaves the house before your husband goes to work, as you are going to work, turn back and tell your husband, “God bless you”. Pray for him, he might not appreciate you but God would reward your labour of love. It is very important to respect our husbands. They are the kings, we are the queens. Respect your husband. Turn every conflict into a joke. We are not perfect, but in our imperfection, we have to learn. If we don’t learn, we would keep having crisis in our homes. Nigeria that is going sour today is because the women has failed. If your husband is doing something or the children are doing something and you don’t care, that is bad. Sometimes, when you are coming, they are running away, how do you expect to get their attention? We have to respect our husbands.

Communication is very vital. It is a vital tool for a good mother. If your husband does not communicate with you, look for avenues to communicate with him. Tell him your day’s activities. If you have left the house since morning, you must have met somebody somewhere, something would have happened. Ask him, “How was your day?” Do you bother to tell your husband, “You are welcome, dear. How was your day?” Some people till today, still call their husbands Joseph, Emma, Idowu, Ajayi, etc. It can’t click. If you want to be a good mother, don’t say, “I am too old, I can’t do it again.” I have a family friend here in Ilorin, they are like our parents, my husband and I call each other “D”, you won’t believe that because of what we call each other, the Baba heading for 80s is calling his wife “D” now. The wife also calls him “D”, so, if they call me on phone, they will say, “How is your D?” and I will reply that he is fine, when I ask him also, he would say she is fine. You can amend your ways, no matter how old you are because God is not going to ask you how old you are. To be a good mother, it’s a training, an institute that has no graduation. You can’t graduate, you must keep learning and learning. As a good mother, you must not forget your responsibilities: you have to manage your home very well. You are a resource.

I want to let us know today that money is the root of evil and that money has broken a lot of homes. I went to Port Harcourt to counsel a family and I discovered that the issue of money was the problem. The husband owns a business and the wife felt money was going out of the business. Her expectation was high, she was expecting too much and at the end of the day, her husband died. Before the husband died, I told her, “If this man should die, I will not be happy with you.” Eventually the man died and she took over the business. Today, the business has collapsed. She felt the husband was getting money but when she took over, she couldn’t manage because there was no more money, the house is now very wretched. So, your marriage should not be based on finances. Your marriage should not be based on the business of your husband. Don’t expect too much from your husband. It is only one person in this life you can expect too much from. Only one person and that is the Alpha and the Omega, the God that never changes. What He cannot do does not exist, that is the only man you should expect a lot from.

We have discussed spending hours on phone. Most of us, our lives now revolves around phones. If we come to church… I don’t bring my phone to church. I can’t go to a church program and use my phone. There are some women, even our men who would be picking calls in the church. Which call is so important to you than the house of God? Than your God who has told you… for example, I who God told He is sitting on this altar, why would I bring my phone and somebody would call me and I would run out or put it on vibration? If you call me on Saturday night, you won’t get me until after the service. Even after the service, at times, I would forget, till evening. What is that important call that you can’t keep your phone in the house? You bring your phone to the church to do what? We don’t pray for emergencies; God will never give us emergencies in Jesus Name. We have to live as mothers. Do away with your phones; it is important to our lives but have a limit because everything has limitations. Even in our personal lives, everything has a limit. As I am, I have a limit. Very soon, I may leave this country or I may still be here; I may live my house and build another one or go somewhere, so our lives have limits and are not permanent. Therefore, have a limitation with that phone.

Some of us would pretend that we are reading the scriptures on our phones. My husband where he sits in the church, one man always brings his phone and do as if he is reading the scriptures and before you know it, he would jump to Whatsapp, Instagram, etc. I told my husband and said, “Change your seat, if you cannot tell him or I would come and tell him to stop distracting you,” because if you are sitting with somebody who is distracting you, it’s not an excuse before God for God will not ask you who it was that was disturbing you. If you are in the church of God and somebody is distracting you with a phone or any gadget, please, keep away. As a good mother, keep away and have limits. People normally say that there is Bible on their phones, yes, we put Bibles on our phones but you see this (hardcopy) document is still very important. I can’t come to church and use my phone; there is nothing wrong about it but I have prayed about it and there is a way I normally feel. So, I prefer the hardcopy. A woman should always use the hardcopy. Don’t pretend with your phone because at the time you are using your phone, a call could come. At the time you are reading your Bible on the phone, a text message could come and those are distractions. Use your hardcopy during your quiet time to study.

All we have been saying is how to keep ourselves closer to God. If you are not closer to God, it is a problem, so we need to be closer to God. Therefore, keep away. Too much of African Magic, football… Some of us, if there is a football match, we don’t go to church that evening. We want to watch Manchester United and Chelsea, as if they are giving you award. What are you getting from there? What are you getting from football? Some people, their wives may be wanting to get their attention but no, they would say, “I have a match” and run off to the viewing centre. Ask yourselves, what is the benefit? You don’t know Ronaldo, yet you want to kill yourself because of Ronaldo. If Ronaldo doesn’t win, they are already angry and when they get home, their wives would no longer have peace. What is Ronaldo giving you? Is there any benefit? I don’t know if there is any benefit. Let us have time for God. When you have God, as a mother, you have peace. Everything comes to you. I pray that the Lord will help us in Jesus Name.

We taught yesterday that if you are a good mother, you don’t leave your children so much in the hands of helpers and teachers. Some of us, teachers are our main people that will always take care of our children; whatever we are doing, they are there. You ask every time, “Teacher, how is my son?” It is the teacher that will give you what you want to hear from them and you yourself won’t even know your child. I know some parents, mothers, that don’t care. They would abandon their child and travel. They would abandon their child to face business. I wish the way we chase about the things of the world, we are chasing God like that because there wouldn’t have been poverty. There wouldn’t have been poverty in our lives if the way we are chasing about the things of the world, we are chasing after God like that. Like I always say, it is a training. You have to train yourself, creating time for your family and creating time for God.

As a good mother, create time for your family. There must be time for your family. Time, quality time, that you will spend with your family. If you don’t do that, you are missing it. Most women don’t spend time with their families, they go about doing one business or the other and as they come back, they are tired and go to bed. When will you communicate? As a good mother, you must spend quality time with your children and husband. Ask them how they are doing. Pray for them. In the night, walk about in your house and pray for them. You have a difficult husband? Pray for him.

The Bible says that a good woman is a woman of noble character. Some women lack character. In your office, business centre, etc. how are they rating you? I always tell people, “Always mirror yourself.” Everything a good mother is doing, you must learn. Mirror yourself. Look at your character, see how you are living with others and see how you are living with your husband. Do you have a good character? Do you shout? I attended the birthday ceremony of one woman somewhere in town and people were called out to come and give testimonies about her. From her main fellowship, people were reluctant to go. Where I was sitting, I said, “What is this? Her fellowship members are here, what is happening?” Where we were sitting, there was an elderly woman there, I told her to save the situation and go and say something. The first son even ran away, that he won’t say anything. They called the second son and he also dodged out. Then, they told the daughter, “You, the girl, will not dodge her because you are like mummy, come and tell us something about mummy.” Do you know what she said? She said, “Please o, you people should help me tell my mother not to shout again.” Where I was sitting, I became cold and said, “What is this?” Because of that, the MC took the microphone from the girl and told her to tell us something good. Are you saying your mother does not advise you? She said, “Well, you people should first tell her not to be shouting again in the house,” then, she gave back the microphone. I wept as a mother and a counsellor and said, “What is this? My own child giving such a testimony about me?” I would go back and examine myself if I were the one but I don’t know if the mother took it seriously because, you know, some women, if something is happening, are not always sensitive. As a good mother, you have to be very sensitive, so that whatever is going on in your family and around you, you will know. We have to have good characters.

When did you carry your wife, King? The men here are the Kings. When did you take your wife out for pleasure trips, even in the garden? When? In the morning, you have gone. In the evening, you are back and in the night, you are sleeping. When do you create time? Our women, please, make your home comfortable and tell your husband what you want. If he is not supporting you, please invite me, I normally follow people to fight their husband because if you are not taking care of your wife… you see, this life is very short. Before you know it now, we are no more. The time we have now, use the presence of God to enjoy yourself and who will you enjoy with? You enjoy with your husband. That is why we have so many immoralities, even in the church. Right in the church, you see church members and choir members going about… I heard of a pastor who has taken his church member as a wife and put the wife aside. We are trying to see how we can sort out that issue right now. There are so many things going on in churches now and that is why the Holy Spirit is leaving us. We would pray and knock our heads, yet no results and you would be thinking why there are no results, you don’t know that the pulpit is polluted? So, we have to be very careful.

Men, as you are seated there, take your wife as a gift from God because yesterday, we discovered that women are gifts to men. Take your wife out, buy her suya, buy her biscuits, etc. I, standing here, I am not extravagant. If my husband says we should go out, I would just take something very small that will not cost him anything. I’m not an expensive woman, if I want anything expensive, I gather my money to go and do it. I don’t want him to be hurt. I don’t go there and see this one that is N100,000 and buy it. No, I won’t do that. There are so many gardens where you could just sit and take a coke that’s not costly. As a woman of God, I don’t think she will go there and start demanding for alcohols. Take a Malt, take pepper soup, etc. Is that too much? You have to have time for your wife and wives, have time for your husbands. How can you play with your wife like that and go home and start quarreling? Most times, it is difficult.

A good mother is the bedrock of her home, the society and the church. When you look at the families of some women, they are not there. Yesterday, we talked about women keeping their houses neat. For some women, you come to their houses and you see that they are not neat. Their parlours are not neat; when they come back, their children will remove their clothes, dump them in the parlour. It doesn’t work like this, it’s a training. If you have not started, you are not too old. Until we die, that is when that training stops. Dress your bed. You get up in the morning, have your morning devotion, quiet time, the next thing to do even before you step into the parlour is to dress your bed. I told my husband that when he gets up in the morning, he has to dress the bed. So, even if I don’t have time to dress the bed, I know that as I am stepping out of the room, my husband will dress the bed. So, we have to know how to dress our bed. The bed you and your husband is sleeping on should always be neat. Don’t scatter your bed. As a good mother, keep your bed very neat. Keep your parlour neat. Keep your kitchen neat. There is no money, we know, but the little you have, use it well as a mother. Don’t forsake your home. Don’t forsake your parlour. Cleanliness is one of the best attributes of a woman.

A good mother must be admirable and positive. If your husband brings up an issue, reason with him. You know, some of us, even before our husband finishes speaking, we say, “That thing is not good at all. Leave it.” You start opposing, meanwhile, you don’t oppose a king. You don’t! The king of your community, you can’t just oppose him, that is the position our husbands find themselves in. If you don’t want to accept it, there would be crisis. Begin to call him “My king” and you will see that the situation in your home will change in Jesus Name. Some of us always have self-justification and we think we are doing well, no, we are not doing well. It is a school, it is a race, we have to keep going and training ourselves to ensure our children… Some of us have very bad children, begin to pray for them and call them to order and I know that God will help us in Jesus Name.

We have to be prayerful. A good mother motivates people to be prayerful. Study the Word of God. Meditate always. Be faithful in the work of God. Yesterday, I told people how I do it in my home, if that one is not working for you, try your own method. You have a husband who drinks and is not stopping, a husband who womanizes… what are you going to tell us here that we do not already know? That your husband carries women up and down is no more news to some of us who are counsellors but how to tame them to stop that attribute is what we are after. If you come to my house and say, “Ma, please o, my husband, there is a girl that he is going after. You see, yesterday, my husband didn’t even come home, he said he traveled, meanwhile, he didn’t even travel. They say….” “They say?” Who is saying to your family wrong things, we bind that spirit in the name of Jesus. Don’t listen! I normally use myself as an example so that people will not say she is talking about other people. If you come to me and tell me that you saw my husband with one woman, you are my enemy for life, I will keep away from you because I know you want to destroy my home. Let me see it by myself. Where is the place of my prayer? I will call God, and before you know, everything happening will scatter.

There was a woman who came to my home and said where the husband was as a Customs Officer, he was fornicating and having many girlfriends, in fact, he was about to marry a wife. I said, “Okay, we will see what we can do, let’s pray”. We held our hands and under five minutes, God revealed that we should go through 5 days prayer and fasting. We did it, not knowing that the man has even impregnated a girl there. The pregnancy came down and the girl almost died. The husband started running up and down, he ran to Ilorin to inform his wife. The wife came to me and we started praying that the girl should not die but before we started doing that, I invited the husband and asked him if he was going to leave that woman. He said, “Ah!” that what he has even spent, I should not tell the wife and he will not do it again. We phoned the wife that evening, she met us in my house, we held our hands and prayed. Along the line, God saved the girl. So, you think these girls following our husbands are safe? They are not safe too. So, if you have a husband who is going after other women, pray, meditate, call on God, stand in the gap and pray for him and I believe the Lord will help us in Jesus name.

Working in the house of God. Some of us are not committed, we come to the church when we like. We are so used to coming to church, that we say, “I must be in church on Sunday” and so, you just come. It is not like that. As a mother, as a father, God is going to ask us what we did in His house. Some of us have the mindset of “I want the pastor/the leader of the team to see me”, God is not interested in that because right here, as we are seated, he is seeing our hearts. So, do the work. Take it upon yourself, look at something and make a difference. I can’t stay in a group of God and not make a difference. If I know I am no more comfortable, I will quietly withdraw because I don’t want God to ask me, “When you were in that group, what did you do?” I used to be in Full Gospel Business Men’s Fellowship, I prayed and one day, God ministered to me. I started thinking, I had to withdraw. You know, when God has spoken, you have to abide. Some of us, when God has spoken, we don’t even know. You have to abide! Some people want to be in the ushering unit, choir, mission team, etc. In how many are you going to function? At the end of the day, you find out that you don’t function anywhere. I have somebody in my church, she’s in almost all the groups, you know what she does? She just appears. If it is cleaning, she would just clean this table and say she has another meeting with another team. She would go there and have to leave again. One day, I had to call her and say, “My friend, come. This thing you are doing will not help you. You are here and there, where are you now? If I as a human being can see what you are doing, what do you think God is doing? Examine yourself. A good wife, every time, examines herself. Take the house of God seriously. You see, Pastors are just the heads. God has put them there to be the head because in every society, there must be a head. Don’t look at your Pastor, do what God says you should do. Do it! If you are mopping, mop it very well. I normally tell even people who stay with me that anything they are doing in the house, they should not do it because of me or because I am there, no. Do it because of God and your conscience. Let us be Good Women in Jesus Name. The Lord will help us. It’s not by our power.

As a good woman, you have to pray. You want to succeed in your house? You have to pray. If you are not praying, where are you? Whether you are a widow… I told the widows and the widowers yesterday, don’t say, “I don’t have a husband or wife,” it’s not an excuse. God is your husband and God is your wife. So, don’t live your life as if you don’t have a husband again and say you will do anything you want, like some do. If you know you cannot stay, get another wife to moderate your life.

I want to let you know today, that the kingdom of God is real and there are no two ways about it. You either go to hell or go to heaven. Train yourself to go to heaven. When you are a trained person in the way of the Lord, anger will no longer be there. You will no longer be angry. I told them yesterday and said, whatever will bring you anger, try and joke over it. Turn it into a joke to your husband or children. It’s not everything you argue or quarrel about. Prayer is the key. When I got married, if my husband is angry, he will not pray again, I will be the only one to kneel down and pray. If I see in the evening that he does not join me, I would go to him and tell him that, “Please o, we have to pray. I couldn’t pray in the morning because you didn’t pray with me, what have I done now? I am sorry, please, I am very sorry from the depth of my heart.” If anything happens in the house, I am the biggest fool. I am the biggest fool in my house but you know what, that has profited me over the years. Because now, it is my husband who says, “Let us pray,” am I still calling him? No. He knows the importance of prayer even more than myself. If you have a husband who is not praying at all and has not changed, begin to examine yourself. Prayer is the key to every home. It has saved and benefited me, I have enjoyed from it. If you come to my house and you think you want to see me and my husband fighting, it’s a lie. We’ll be there happily until the day you leave. You know, there are some people that will come to your home just to see what is happening in your home. Yesterday, we talked about unfriendly friends, they are all over. We also have unfriendly in-laws and all that, their coming there is for a purpose, tell them that you are for Christ. If you come to my house, I am for Christ. If you are doing what is wrong, I will tell you, in love.

For some women, when their in-laws are in their houses, they don’t like them. I don’t know why this is so. You have a mother, even though your mother may be late, at least you had a mother, your husband also has a mother or had a mother. He has relations, you have relations. Why on earth must you love your own people more than your husband’s people? You have a mother who delivered you just like your husband. Begin to make your in-laws, no matter how bad they are, your friends. Then, you will see the best in-laws. If they don’t call you, they will not sleep. Begin to make them your friends. Some of these things, we will learn; it is not a day’s magic. Some of us complain a lot about our in-laws, “My in-law came to the house. When he came, he told my husband not to even give me money.” “You see, that my sister-in-law does not like me.” Does not like you? There was one recently who said her sister-in-law was always fighting her. I said, “In this Ilorin?” I asked her what happened and she said, “Nothing,” so I said we are going to see. I then told her that we have to go and see her sister-in-law. So, one day we left and do you know, when we were leaving, she left empty-handed. So, on our way, I asked her, “You are going to your sister-in-law’s house just like that?” She said, “Haha, what would I have taken?” I told her that we shall get some loaves of bread. We got there, knocked and entered the gate. The sister-in-law welcomed us very well, and according to her, it was because she saw me. The bread was in her hand and I told her to hand them over. You know, when she gave her the bread, I could see the excitement on the lady’s face. She took the bread, saying, “Ah! Thank you. You bought bread for me, thank you.” She took us inside and gave us drinks. When she went inside to bring drinks, the sister I am with said, “Eh, she is doing this because of you” but I told her that wasn’t true. Do you know that that day was a turning point in her life? She now realized that each time she is going there, as small as it is, she would get something for her. From that day till today, they are still friends.

As a wife, you are not from your husband’s family. For example, I left my place to marry my husband. I left my family to go to another family and I will start making trouble? No. There is no situation that is ever terrible. Some of you would say, “We have been married for 25 years,” is that a certificate? God will not ask you for that. Whether you have been married for 100 years, maintain a good relationship with your in-laws, it’s very important. No matter how small, here in Yoruba land, I was told that if you are married, you will call a small boy “boda”, what is bad in calling a small boy “boda”? If I see a little boy and say, “Boda, how are you?” What is bad in it? No matter how difficult it is, make your in-laws your friends. If you fall into that category, let us begin to address those issues. Give them small gifts. Even your husband, if he hates you, give him small gifts. Encourage him. I told you people how to pray yesterday. If my husband does anything that is not good, by the time I started praying, he already knows that he is the one I am praying for, and before you know, he has changed. Turn everything to a joke and turn it prayer. I pray the Lord will help us in Jesus Name.

We have talked about anger. Anger is a sin, please do away. Control your emotions. Control whatever you are passing through. You are not the only one. I told you yesterday that whatever we are experiencing here in the church, country, family, etc. it is here inside this Bible, people have suffered from it before. Try not to be angry, train yourself to keep away anger from you. Any friend that is not leading you to God, do away. You cannot be my friend if you are not in God, you cannot! I can’t even keep you. I’m not saying we should not encourage them. If I have a friend who is not born again, I know her place. You cannot tell me something and I would follow you. I am the one that will tell you and you will follow me because some of us, it’s our friends who are destroying our homes.

Intimacy with your family. Get your family together; pray together, laugh together, create fun every time. If your husband is not doing it, you do it and encourage your husband to follow suit. We have already discussed on lack of good home maintenance. Maintain your house very well. Ensure that you don’t, as a woman, get drunk. Don’t! Some of us, when we have situations, we think alcohol is the best, no! It is just a killer. It can cause so many diseases, please, don’t ever do that.

Lack of trust. We so much live among each other yet, we don’t have trust. You see some husbands beat their wives. A king boxing his wife? How can you bring yourself so low to fight your wife? What is that thing you cannot ask God to take control of? Rely and trust only in God. Whatever you have, don’t beat your wife, it is not good. If you have a dysfunctional family, such thing would always happen but keep it away. As a mother, as a father, you can’t come to this decent church and then, you get home and start fighting your husband or wife. Please, anything that could bring enmity between you and your husband, keep it away.

Caring. Care for your husband. I am from a royal home and my mother used to care for my father because he was the King. Your husband is a King, take care of him. I don’t want you to bother about whether your husband is taking care of you. If he’s not taking care of you, pray and before you know it, he will start taking care of you in Jesus Name. Take care of your children. Don’t leave your children in the hands of others. Please, be obedient to your husband. If he says, “Mama Funke, you are foolish.” Say, “Yes, D.” I know it’s not easy. Please, let us not stand problem or family wahala. Conflict should be far away from our homes, not that we would not have conflict at all because no man is perfect, but let us make it so light that it will go on its own. If today, I tell my husband to go away, he knows that in the next minute, I will call him so that we eat together, he would not even be angry. If he tells me anything, I would not be angry, let us apply it in our homes and pray for divine protection over our homes because the days are evil. You may even be living well when one witchcraft or power will come and before you know it, everything is disorganized. So pray very well! We talked of poor communication yesterday and hammered on it. If your husband is not talking, you talk, make him start talking. Be the talking type and before you know it, it would affect him and he would start talking.

Look at 1 Corinthians 9:24. This marriage, this good motherhood, to be a good wife, is a race. It is a race and in this portion of the Bible, some people… and that’s how some marriages are… are running their race to get a physical crown, while some are running that race because they want to get everlasting crown. How are you running the race of your family? How do you manage your home? To be a good mother is a race. If you don’t get anything I have said here, get that to be a good mother is a race. It’s a race that you will run and keep running. Why? Because you want to get a crown. That passage tells us about those who are getting a crown, just a worldly crown and that is how some of us are, we say, “I am married. I am in my own house and so, I can do anyhow” because you are staying in that man’s house? No, you are not to live anyhow. I appeal to us this morning, as we are beautifully dressed that on the last day, we meet at the feet of Christ. Let us live our lives well. Let us run our race well as a family that is living for God; like children that are God’s children; like people who are God’s people. God treasures a woman. The day a woman will become the president of this country, that is when this country would be better again. It is only a woman that can fix this country and if you are going to be among the women that would fix this country, you have to be a good mother. Run a race as she who wants to get a crown. Keep your family in order. Stop fighting, quarreling and having misunderstanding unnecessarily. Stop nagging, keep your homes clean. Be a good wife, pet your husbands.

I dislike people that say, “My husband is not doing this…?” What are you doing? Do you know that some women, because their lives are not reflecting Christ is why their husbands are doing what they are doing? Let your life reflect Jesus. Anything that you are doing, do it for God. Let people see you. If I am going to my office for instance and my students are waiting for me, except somebody who has never been to my office, but if it is my regular students, immediately I enter, they would pause because they know that something is going to happen there before I would allow them come in. If you go to your business centre, let them know you for that, that you have to pray and commit that place to God before you sell your sweets. Let your husband know that you are a true Christian. For some women, their Christianity is not showing, so when they want to talk and say, “I’m a Christian,” their husband will tell them to go and sit down because their lives are not reflecting it.

Having said all these, there is no perfect mother. Always examine yourself and your character. Let us examine ourselves and character. Do away with self-justification. Husbands, as I am talking to the wives, I am also talking to you. Self-justification should be far away from our families. Be ready to learn and be teachable. Seek counsel. Know the right person to share your problems with because that person will help you. Please, be teachable and be ready to listen when you are given advice. As a Christian, if somebody comes to give me any wrong advice, I will say, “No. I know the advice that is right and the one that is not right.”

Endeavour always to be cheerful. Be cheerful always in your house. Have a good family altar. Be trustworthy. Be a teacher. Accept responsibilities. Teach your children love. Cook well. Some of us don’t even bother, we do the ewedu anyhow, put the iru and that’s all. No! Cook well. Cook in your house very well. It’s not about using many ingredients. It’s not when you put many ingredients that you are a good cook. Cook well in your home. Some of us, we leave our cooking to our housemaids because we are too busy. Find time to cook for your husband and when you cook, they should know that it is you who prepared that meal. I pray the Lord will help us in Jesus Name.

Join Fellowships in the Church. Be active in the church. Clean the church, arrange the chairs, be one of the first to be here and I pray God will count us worthy in Jesus Name; make sure you do it well, don’t be spectators. Some of us are seated here, we may not be in any group, some of us are in groups but we may not function, where are you? What will you tell God. Do not fight your husband, don’t ever. Why do you think God kept counsellors, pastors and people to counsel people? You have a problem and you keep it to yourself, it is wrong. Get somebody trustworthy to handle your issues for you. If you don’t have any, we are all available here and God will use us for your case. Keep away from calamity and keep away from trouble. Don’t allow your pastor to fall by your hands. Some women know how to make pastors fall.

Having said all these, always examine yourself like I said and be prayerful. A good mother is born again, diligent, loving, prayerful, humble, homely, meditate on the word of God and makes sure she is always close to God all the time. I pray that God in His infinite mercy will show us mercy in the name of Jesus.


Father, release your anointing upon your children in Jesus Name. Every broken home in this congregation, Father, we ask that tonight you make amends, reconcile them and keep them in peace in Jesus Name. Those who are going about drinking, womanizing and making their wives unhappy, Lord, from today, put a stop to it in Jesus Name; Holy Spirit, descend mightily and help them to constitute a good family in Jesus Name.

We cover everyone here with the Blood of Jesus and we ask, O Lord, that you will have your way in Jesus Name. Father, the children in this church, make them homely and respectful. Let them honour their parents and honour the church. Blessed be your holy name.

We cover everyone with the blood of Jesus. This celebration today, will be a turnaround in your family in the name of Jesus and you will enjoy the peace of the Lord, financial breakthrough, spiritual breakthrough, divine healing, protection and in the name of Jesus. Once again, you are covered with the Blood of Jesus and it shall be well with each one of us in Jesus Name.

Thank you, Jesus for answered prayers. In Jesus mighty name we have prayed. Amen.

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